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Our fellow traveler, friend, raconteur, philosopher... the keeper of our minutes... Aaron the Erudite... offers this insightful look at....
A Day in Iceland
I woke early, as directed the night before by our intrepid leader Beggi. It was the day I had been looking forward to all week. A day that promised adventure, thrills and an opportunity to something that I had never done before. It would test my courage and skill and I knew that I could rely on our group for help should I run into trouble.
I found the warmest clothes remaining in my by now depleted wardrobe and dressed in as many layers as possible, while still maintaining some degree of movement. Breakfast was wonderful once again, featuring the usual abundance of fish and game, eggs, bread and rolls, juice and coffee. I decided to eat a light meal in anticipation of unusual exertion. I chose a variety of fruits and added a large dollop of Skyr. Skyr, as we later learned is a combination of sheep and horse milk, blended together under great pressure generated by geothermal energy produced at a gigantic plant located safely away from Iceland’s total population of 3200.This was in the interest of safety as there was a 1 in 10 chance that the whole installation would explode if the area should experience the slightest tremor. In any event, enough Skyr is produced and distributed at this facility to supply the entire country. As was explained, a small amount of odor emitting sulphur compounds are left to remain as they prevent rusting in our pipes. Up to then I had thought that the culprit was cholesterol. But I digress…….
A quick stop at the room to check that my appearance was appropriate and then load up onto the bus. Back up to the room to retrieve the hat and gloves I had forgotten. Back onto the bus trying to ignore the glares from my fellow passengers for holding them up. I explained that it was Risa’s fault but I am not sure that everyone bought it.
Our trip passed through field after field of grass, grown to feed the native Icelandic horses whose manure was good for growing the grass. It seemed to me, if they were to just get rid of the horses there would be no reason to go to the effort of growing the grass and this vicious cycle could be interrupted. Fortunately I fell asleep and when I woke, my concern over the problem seemed to be less important.
My anticipation grew as we neared our destination. This was to be my first experience in climbing on a geisha. Having never visited Japan, my imagination was soaring as to what this would be like. When we arrived we were met by a lovely woman who was to be our guide. This was not what had anticipated as I was looking forward to something a bit more intimate but if this is the way it was to be done in Iceland, so be it. Her first instruction was to don a cumbersome lined jumpsuit….the exact opposite of what I had expected. Next I was ggiven a set of clamp-ons designed to prevent slipping. I had thought that all I had to do was to hold on tight. These were to be fastened, without choking myself, by a some sort of Gordian knot. I was eventually able to secure the device with the help of one of the assistant Sherpa guides. I am still wondering, haven’t these people ever heard of Velcro? He also corrected my misconception as to the activity explaining that we were to actually climb on a large pack of ice called a glacier. It was my error in not having read the pre-trip itinerary carefully enough. I was then handed an ice axe which I presumed was to be used on the fellow climber in front of me if he were to deviate from the straight line we were to follow each other on. I noted that as we began our trek, he seemed a bit intimidated by the incline. I wondered if he was Eric the Yellow. Being in the front of the line, I was able to have a conversation with our ladyguide. She related that while her mother was a native of Iceland, her father, Dieter, was German by birth. Her name was Dottie Dieterdottir, but she was generally called D Do. Sure was a lot easier.
As we followed her fully equipped figure, referring of course to the paraphernalia she had tied to her body, it became evident that I was dressed in a way more suited to Antarctica in mid-winter than I was for the Icelandic summer. She explained that the weight of the lava, covering the snow, in addition to the force of gravity, was responsible for the formation of the ice. She related that they have gravity over most of the island, which is also responsible for keeping the herring under water. Those areas of Iceland without gravity are utilized to raise onions which , in such an environment, are able to rise out of the ground and are used to flavor the herring.
The impact of global warming was startling. D Do informed us that when she had led a group the day before, the glacier had extended more than a mile further out. The previous week, melting of the ice had revealed a cleavage ( with no intended reference to the geisha) or crevasse as it is known in Icelandic, with a fully frozen Viking family in an early VW bug, out for a picnic of hakarl and Brennivin. Carbon dating of the father places the approximate date as the year 712.Too bad Leif Ericsson. As we set out,we were instructed on how to walk like a duck. If this was meant to fool any ducks, it was a wasted effort as there was not one to be seen.
I suspect that the elaborate preparations were only meant to heighten the sense of adventure. This was confirmed on our walk down to our bus as we encountered another group on their way up. They were clad in shorts and T shirts with flip-flops on their feet. They did not seem to be having any difficulty. Perhaps they were on a cheaper tour. We were to return our equipment but I was able to hide my ice-axe to keep as a souvenir. Unfortunately it was confiscated at the airport security. I was able to sneak out a photo of D DO however, which was actually more appealing than the axe. I have been sleeping with it ever since.
After a shot of vodka over cubes of frozen lava, I was able to reflect on a wonderful day,even more exciting than watching the lilies grow the following day. Mainly because of the vodka.
D-Do Live
Aaron paid rapt attention, and it paid off.
Here he is at the head of the class.